Dear Mr. Plow

I know we've had our differences - ever since the first snow fall after we moved into the new house and you thought that it would be okay to plow a whole street full of snow halfway up our driveway because you still thought no one lived in the house - I've been less than impressed by your overall lack of respect for the snow-blower lacking, plowless minions that live in this city.

Yesterday was a prime example! Now, I know that there are only so many of you and that Kingston is a fairly good size city, but come on - waiting until after 1:00 in the morning to plow our street, especially after the painstaking effort it took to clear out all the snow and freezing rain off the driveway - I think a part of you loves shoving that 2 foot, solidly packed, heap of snow all along the bottom of the driveway, especially hoping that people have to work in the morning and will thus have to dig themselves out before going anywhere (at least that's what the smart people do - why some of the people in our neighbourhood think that they'll be able to clear a 2 foot pile of snow that's about 3 feet into the bottom of their driveway with a car going not more than 20 km/h in reverse is beyond me).

On a brighter note though, Mr. Plow, I'm thinking about writing a book...I'll call it, "The Canadian Woman's Ultimate Winter Workout" and it'll go something like this:

Introduction: Snow is your friend
Chapter One: Proper technique for pushing vehicles
Chapter Two: Advanced technique for uphill vehicle pushing
Chapter Three: Running uphill in the snow...aka...burning lungs
Chapter Four: If you time it right, falling = lunges
Chapter Five: Bend, scoop, turn and toss: Shovelling the light fluffy stuff
Chapter Six: Bend, groan, chop, scoop, turn, curse, scoop again, walk and dump: When its more than just snow
Conclusion: Muscle aches and pains: Stretches to do before you sit in the hottest bath you can stand

I think it'll be a big seller - and it's all based on my experience in the last two days. If it weren't for you, Mr. Plow, I'd never have had the joys of pushing cars and tossing 300 pounds of snow, so for that, I thank you (so long as my book sells a millon plus copies)